Guest Post: Bricks and Bread.

This post has nothing to do with New York, or NUSTAR or anything else related to TwiDurf in NYC. Sorry.

When I was in college, I used to attempt to make bread. Occasionally, it came out OK and was actually edible. More often than not, though, it came out of the oven as a hot, dense mass of baked flour. It was barely edible when it was hot, but as it cooled, it became something more akin to a construction grade brick than food. Those loaves were guaranteed to break your teeth, if not your entire jaw. Needless to say, everyone thought these brick-loaves were rather funny. In our sophomore year, my room mate's parents came to visit for a few days, and I again attempted to make bread, which came out predictably brick-like. Before they left, they went to a local bookstore bought a book for me: "Bake Your Own Bread" by Floss and Stan Dworkin.

In the book, I learned that my problem was probably not getting the yeast going properly by not using hot enough water, and not letting the yeast, salt, sugar (or honey), and water mixture sit long enough. Even better, I learned that all of that kneading I had been doing was unnecessary! If you use a hand-mixer, and you run it for about 10 minutes after you've mixed the liquid ingredients with the first cup or two of flour, it does all of the same work of making the gluten sticky that the kneading does. After that, the only kneading you need to do is whatever it takes to get all of the flour into the dough.

If you want to try it out, here's a challah recipe for you. It's become a tradition for us to make this at Thanksgiving and Christmas. This bread makes really good French Toast.

Ingredients:
Group 1:
2 pkgs active dry yeast
4 teaspoons salt
3/4 cup honey (room temp)
1 3/4 cups hot water (about 125 degF)

Group 2:
2 cups white flour

Group 3:
1 1/4 cups unsaturated oil (e.g., canola, safflower, or soy)
3 large eggs (room temp)

Group 4:
5-6 cups additional white flour (note: up to 3 cups of whole-wheat flour can be substituted for the white flour)

Group 5:
Egg white from one large egg
Poppy or sesame seeds (optional)

Mix the Group 1 ingredients in a large bowl, and let sit for 5-10 minutes until the yeast makes a good foam.
Add the two cups of flour from Group 2, and run your hand mixer for 10+ minutes.
Add the Group 3 ingredients and blend well.
Slowly add the (Group 4) 5-6 cups of additional flour. Don't feel the need to use all 6 cups, the less you use, the lighter the bread will be. Remember, you don't need to do any kneading, so you can leave the dough slightly wetter than you might otherwise.

Cover the bowl and let it sit in a WARM place for 1-2 hours until the dough has doubled in size. If it never doubles, don't worry, it will most likely come out fine in the end. I usually put the bread in an oven and set it to Warm for a few minutes, then turn off the heat. This can be a problem, see below.

After the dough is done rising, or you're done waiting for it, pour it out on a floured board, punch it down, and separate it into however many braids you want to make. I often do three, but sometimes I make 4 on the bottom and 3 smaller braids on top. This recipe is sized for two normal sized loaves, but since I usually make it for a holiday dinner, I use a large glass pan and make it as one large loaf. Roll the dough in your hands to make long strips, then braid them together. When finished, pick up the loaf and put it into the pan. There's plenty of oil in the bread, so as long as you're using a non-stick pan or a clean glass pan, there's no need to grease the pan. I usually use a bit of corn meal to make it easier to get the bread out when it's done.

Let the dough rise again in the pan, until about doubled, then brush with (Group 5) egg whites, and add the seeds (if you want them). Put the bread into a cold oven and set the temperature to 325 F. Bake for about 50 min, or until a long toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. My oven has very uneven heat, so I have to watch it like a hawk to prevent the bottom from burning.

This is what happened in December when I used a plastic bowl:

Yeah, leaving a plastic bowl in a warm oven is a bad idea.

This is how the bread comes out:

Usually, we color the braids red and green for Christmas. The year this picture was taken, my youngest daughter decided we should color one of the loaves at Thanksgiving, too. I have no recollection why blue, green, and purple were picked. It tasted much better than it looked!